4 Months post surgery

Yesterday was exactly 4 months post surgery for me. I had set a target of 50 pounds down by that date but missed it by 1.5 pounds. I'm not upset about it because I know I will lose that pound and a half, it's just a matter of time.

So, what have I learned? How are things different from four months ago?

• Last year I was miserable, just really unhappy with myself and my inability to control my weight. I felt like I was spiralling out of control.  Now, I feel much more optimistic and in control. I've learned that food is not my enemy; I enjoy it and it nourishes my body.
• I'm learning to be kind to myself. No negative self-talk when I look in the mirror.
• This is still work in progress - the number on the scale will not dictate how I feel about myself. I've found that I lose steadily for a couple of weeks and then nothing for a week or two before I hit a new low. Prior to surgery, during my many weight loss attempts if the scale didn't register a loss or moved up I would become really frustrated and use it as license to eat whatever I wanted. Of course this always took me back to where I started pre-diet plus a few additional pounds for good measure.
• I am now making the effort to get out more and get together with friends. As my weight crept up I would find any excuse to decline invitations.
• I had forgotten that I like exercise. It does great things for my head and heart and of course the endorphins are pretty good too. In a few short days I will run my first 5K, something I never thought I would be able to do.
• I may not make the best food choices all of the time but I aim for good choices 90% of the time. It's not about perfection and I'm not on a diet.